Most parents say they are raising children they love. Karl Studer has a different perspective that he shares openly with his wife: he is glad she loves their children, but his goal is making sure they can eventually leave and thrive independently. This distinction shapes everything about his approach to parenting five children, or six including his niece who became part of the family.
The philosophy comes directly from how his own father raised him. Despite limited financial resources, Studer’s father went out of his way to ensure Karl had two to three hours of outdoor chores every single day. This was not about ranching profits or agricultural necessity but about character development. The cost and inconvenience did not matter because the goal was not raising children you keep but preparing them to not need you.
Studer admits he did not execute this as effectively as his father did, perhaps not pushing quite as hard, but his children got the message loud and clear. They always had morning and night chores regardless of other activities or commitments. Sports, school events, and social opportunities could not become excuses for avoiding responsibilities. The consistent expectation taught accountability and work ethic that transcended any specific agricultural skills.
The results validated the approach. When his son left for the Marines, he told Studer something that initially sounded harsh but ultimately represented the highest compliment. Many of his friends had parents who raised them to need their parents, creating ongoing dependency. Studer had done something different and valuable: raised a son who no longer needed him. The young man could leave on his own terms, pursuing what he wanted his way, fully capable of independent functioning.
This philosophy extends to current parenting challenges. Studer recently gathered all his children to discuss the family enterprise’s future. He made clear that if everything falls apart in their generation, he will haunt them. But the goal is creating sustainability across generations so grandchildren and their descendants benefit while making other people’s lives better through their efforts.
The approach requires different parenting at different life stages. Studer acknowledges being a different father now than ten years ago or five years ago. The job demands constant adaptation, but the underlying principle remains constant: prepare children for independence rather than creating comfortable dependency that serves parental ego but handicaps the next generation.