Scooter Chronicles

This past weekend I finished reading “The Electric Church” by Jeff Somers. And when I mean that I “finished reading” it, I mean that I decided that I would not continue reading any further.

Here is the book description I read that got me interested found on Amazon.Com before the book was available:

In the near future, the only thing growing faster than the criminal population is the Electric Church, a new religion founded by a mysterious man named Dennis Squalor. The Church preaches that life is too brief to contemplate the mysteries of the universe: eternity is required. In order to achieve this, the converted become Monks — cyborgs with human brains, enhanced robotic bodies, and virtually unlimited life spans. Enter Avery Cates, a dangerous criminal known as the best killer-for-hire around. The authorities have a special mission in mind for Cates: assassinate Dennis Squalor. But for Cates, the assignment will be the most dangerous job he’s ever undertaken — and it may well be his last.

It sounded enticing. One thing that really gets my interest with sci-fi books is the world building that authors do. I suspected that it could be quite a treat to see what Somers came up with. What the book turned out to be was a very noir story, in first person, and little world building, or that which was original.

Somers has a tendency to repeat things. And often. In the epilogue the narrator continually tells us how old he is, then says that he is only 27 years old. It took another 50 pages to get to some kind of reasoning of why that is considered old in this “universe”. The bulk of what I read takes place in New York City in the future. Not sure how far, which was a redeeming quality of the explaining. It will help keep this book from seeming dated in our future. And pretty much all of New York is falling apart. Most, if not all, of the buildings Cates encounters is a burned out hulk. And he is continually telling the reader this. No one works anymore, unless you work for one of the two police agencies that take care of the area. No explanation why people don’t work anymore in what is referred to as the “unification”, and I can only assume that they mean the entire planet has become one nation. Both police agencies are corrupt, and again the reader is continually told this, though no reasons are brought up on why this may be. Cates and his buddies usually can be found drinking at one of the many illegal “gin joints” and every single one is based in a old about-to-fall-over building and the all serve really bad alcohol, and again, the reader is continually told this.

Jeff Somers

Another problem: I am not easily offended when it comes to language in books. Quite honestly, I am not offended much by cursing at all. But there are way too many “F-bombs” in this book, and I didn’t even get halfway through it. I can understand the author wanting to go for realism in a story, but it goes beyond that. Every character, including women, freely use the word in many different forms (noun, verb, adjective, etc.). It is ridiculous.

One of the characters, Kev something or other (sorry, I don’t have the patience to go back and look), is referred to as a “Pusher”. Not what we would think either. He has the ability to look someone in the eyes and basically hypnotize them in an instant. There is a price to pay in loss of energy, and it is hard to maintain. This was an interesting addition to the story, but again there is no explanation (at least up until the point I read to) of why people are like this. That is part of the fun of sci-fi!

I was very disappointed with the book. I didn’t even want to hang around and read more because it was just too repetitive. Not only is Cates saying the same things over and over again in his narrative, the dialogue doesn’t progress the story very much either. I can honestly say that I wouldn’t be surprised that some people would love this book. But I am certainly not one of them.